“I’m looking for something deeper.”
As a pastor, when someone comes to our church from somewhere else, or when someone leaves our church to go somewhere else, this is a common phrase we hear.
Over time, I’ve learned to ask what the person means, rather than assuming. There’s an old cliche about the danger of assumptions which I’ve learned is pretty accurate.
“What do you mean deeper?” I’ll ask.
Is it more knowledge?
Is it more information about the history of the text or original languages?
Is it a hunger to be equipped for your service in the church?
I’ve heard lots of different answers, along with a large number of people who are bewildered by the question.
I wonder, especially for those who can’t explain their longing concretely, if it is a hunger to dive deeper than they’ve ever been before.
Could our hunger for deeper lead us to allowing God to take us deeper into who He is as He goes deeper into who we are?
That’s the hunger behind Ryan Ellis' newest project including his popular song with Brandon Lake, "Son of David."
WATCH NOW: Ryan Ellis - Son of David (Official Lyric Video) ft. Brandon Lake
RELATED CONTENT: Ryan Ellis & Brandon Lake Cry Out For Mercy From the King in "Son of David"
In an interview around the launch of the album, Ellis said, “What I want people to take away from this project is a deep relationship with the Lord.”
Based on the story behind the song, recorded in Matthew 10:46-52, Ellis clearly believes a deep relationship with the Lord includes healing.
In that passage, we meet a man named Bartimaeus who needed healing. He could not see. His only option to provide for his needs was begging. He was subject to the people around him - to make his life better or make it worse.
On this day, when he heard Jesus was nearby, he cried out the words which Ellis repeats in the chorus, “Have mercy on me!” The people around him had no patience for his cries for help and they sought to shut him up. However, the people who tried to quiet him only made him louder. Eventually, Bartimaeus’ stubbornness worked. The text says, “When Jesus heard him, he stopped and said, 'Tell him to come here.' So they called the blind man. 'Cheer up,' they said. 'Come on, he’s calling you!' Bartimaeus threw aside his coat, jumped up, and came to Jesus. 'What do you want me to do for you?' Jesus asked.”
And when Jesus asked him what he wanted, Bartimaeus knew. “I want to see.”
Bartimaeus knew himself and he knew his needs.
To be crying out for mercy indicates an awareness of your need for mercy - because of your awareness of your sin or your limits to control life and avoid suffering.
Ellis tapped into this self-awareness in the bridge of “Son of David.”
“I'm blinded and I can't see
And I'm broken without Your peace
God I need You
To come and set me free”
John Calvin’s words sum up the experience of Bartiameus here. “Without knowledge of self, there is no knowledge of God.”
As beautiful as this moment of Bart’s healing was, all I can think of was his life and journey to this day. What did it take for him to be this ready to run to Jesus? What did it take for him to be this ready to answer Jesus? How many of us would have a ready made answer for Jesus if he asked us today, “What do you want?”
There are some days when people tell me they want to go deeper that I want to ask them, “Are you scared?” Because I would be!
If Jesus started taking me deeper, I think I’d be nervous and scared. More of God is what I want, but what will that mean? Am I ready to experience more of God? And if God goes deeper into me, what will He find? What might have to change because of that deep dive?
Going deeper with God certainly might lead to healing, but it also might include a lot of discomfort too. Are you ready for the discomfort which comes with going deeper with God? Are you ready for the discomfort which might come with other people judging you? What if you end up like Bart did, with your “friends” giving you the side eye as you unashamedly cry out for mercy and healing?
Those are questions that only you can answer. You might not have those answers today and that’s okay. Ellis would want you to know there’s a place for you.
“If you find yourself in your own trenches, if you find yourself broken, overwhelmed, missing someone, suffering- there's something here for you.” -Ryan Ellis
The song “Son of David” doesn’t claim to have all the answers or resolve things for us neatly. The song doesn’t resolve what God’s mercy might mean, but it does invite us to cry out to Him because we’ve gotten honest about where we are, what we need, and what we want God to do.
So, if you have a need today, turn on "Son of David," cry out to God, and keep going deeper with Him. Keep pursuing Jesus, running after Him, and even ignoring those who don’t get your hunger because you know what you want and you know the One who has it.
Scott Savage is a pastor and a writer, and yes he does have the best last name ever. He leads Cornerstone Church in Prescott, Arizona. Scott is married to Dani and they are the proud parents of three children. He loves helping hurting people forgive others through his Free to Forgive course and you can read more of his writing at scottsavagelive.com.
